All About Sex Toys
There can be a lot of shame around using sex toys for pleasure, especially for women. We are often discouraged from seeking our own pleasure and the thought of using toys with your partner(s) or even the thought of masturbating may make some of your think, “ew, gross, no way!”.
This blog is not intended to provide opinions or judgement regardless of your relationship with the use of sex toys, rather it is simply to provide education around them. If you are interested in exploring your own beliefs and opinions around the use of sex toys for pleasure, feel free to journey over to the “Contact” page to contact me and schedule an intake.
There are many things to consider when using sex toys, including the materials they are made of, the compatibility of using certain toys with certain barriers or lubes, shelf life of the items, etc. In this blog we will cover some of the overarching material types often used/seen and things to consider when purchasing and/or using them.
Let’s start with Elastomers, these are a type of “polymer” that has elasticity which means it basically resembles a rubber or squishy plastic-like material. These types of toys can be great if you are looking for a cheaper option and wanting something that feels relatively soft. It can also be great for trying out new styles of toys to get a sense of what you like and don’t like before choosing to spend a lot of money on a product.
With this material it is important to note that they are typically porous which means that they are much harder to wash after use. If you are considering a toy with this material or already use these types of toys it is important to be mindful when using it in order to ensure safety and cleanliness. Here are some ideas for how to enjoy this type of toy:
Keeping it as an external use toy only
Saving this toy as one you use only with one person or for yourself
Avoiding use for anything anal-this is important!
Using a condom over the toy if you are going into the body
Avoid buying ones that contain Phthalates (you can read more about this here: https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/earth-and-planetary-sciences/phthalates), as they are not good for the body (basically avoid buying these types of toys online if possible)
Wash the toy IMMEDIATELY after use, do not risk waiting as bacteria can grow quickly
Also important to note, is that Elastomer toys work best with water-based lubricants as opposed to silicone, oil, or hybrid lubes.
Our next category is Plastic, please make sure that you are getting toys made from medical grade plastics such as ABS (acrylonitrile-butadiene-styrene). It is important to remember that with anything that is entering the body you want to make sure it is actually safe to have inside you. This material is often found in vibrating toys and are typically louder and not as long lasting. These toys can be great for anyone who enjoys something that is more firm and is compatible with any type of lube. A quick side note, rechargeable toys typically last longer than those that require batteries.
Next we will explore blends such as soft skin or Silkskyn toys, these are usually made up of a mix of silicone and other materials such as ABS. They are great for something that feels a bit more realistic and “life-like” than traditional plastic toys, however, be mindful that they are also porous and need to be cleaned regularly and left to air dry. To help keep these toys soft you can use cornstarch or baby powder after they have been cleaned and dried.
Probably one of the most common but also can be a bit pricey are Silicone toys. It is most ideal to purchase “high-grade" silicone if you can afford it. These toys are 100% non-porous which means they are easy to clean and can even be boiled in water to clean (as long as they do not contain a motor). Most anal toys can be found in this material as well as other toys and they can be great for pairing with vibrators as they transmit vibrations fairly well.
It is important to keep in mind lube compatibility when using silicone toys, you cannot use silicone lube or it will degrade the toy overtime! Use water-based lubes for the best results and make sure to reapply as often as needed, it is important to use appropriate lubrication when using silicone since they do not tend to slide easily on their own.
Lastly we will discuss Glass and Steel toys. These toys seem to get a bad rep but can actually be great depending on your needs. These can be a nice option because they tend to be safe for the body and easy to clean. It is ideal to get tempered glass or 100% stainless steel. These toys are long lasting and can be great for anyone who enjoys something with more weight to it or if you enjoy playing around with temperature as they can be easily warmed up or cooled down based on preference.
Please keep in mind that if you have glass toys and they drop, you want to check really well for any hairline fractures before using it again.
Phew, we covered a lot but hopefully this information allows you to make smart and mindful choices when thinking about purchasing or using sex toys. If you are looking for more information or have specific questions about sex toys, barriers, or lubes, ask your local sex toy shop. If you are an Asheville local, check out VaVaVoom downtown, they have friendly staff members and are really knowledgable!
If reading this blog brought up any discomfort, was triggering, or peaked your curiosity, feel free to contact me today to learn more about starting therapy to explore and enhance your sexual health and healing.
